I put a bottle of prosecco in the fridge at some point last year, waiting for the moment when Boris Johnson finally resigned. I have no idea how many months it’s been there — maybe more than a year — but, as we all have, I’ve had to wait a very long time for the moment when his resignation came.
At around 12:30PM today, it came. Or rather, something that could be interpreted enough as a resignation speech that would halt the wave upon wave of governmental resignations that began on Tuesday night and continued into this morning. Something that would allow the man to scrape through yet another day. Someone somewhere crowed that they had finally ‘skewered the greased piglet’, but to me, it did not sound very much like a resignation speech at all. In fact, without the slightest hint of contrition to be heard in it, it sounded more like a campaign speech than a resignation one.
He didn’t say the word. He gave no indication that he had paid a visit to our ailing 96-year old monarch, as the conventions of Britain’s unwritten constitution demands of its resigning Prime Ministers. And he stated that he would hold on until a successor had been chosen by the Conservative Party. Johnson has subsequently stated that there will be no new policies brought in while he is ‘holding the fort’ for his successor, which is probably a consolation of sorts, at least, particulary given some of the legislative horrors that had edging towards the statute book.
I have now knowingly lived through the resignation of five Tory Prime Ministers, including Johnson. Ted Heath was PM when I was too young to be much aware of politics. Thatcher resigned when I was 19. Although I struggle to recall much about the moment, I know it would have been a huge relief that her 11 years in office had finally come to an end. Major was ultimately ousted by Blair in the heady and exuberant circumstances of the ’97 election. I particularly remember pulling up the lounge window of my then flat and hollering with joy into the dark street when Portillo lost his seat. It was a huge relief when Cameron stepped down as it signalled the curtain falling on the era that had started with austerity and ended with that terrible referendum campaign (and result). May’s resignation was almost more of a relief than Cameron’s, as she’d seemingly turned out to be an even worse PM than her predecessor had been.
Johnson’s? It has felt so far like a huge anti-climax.
No doubt like many others, I was desperate to see some acknowledgement that this malignant narcissist, who had done so, so much damage to the country in the time that he’d been supposedly leading it, recognised even the slightest extent of the havoc and devastation he had wrought on the United Kingdom. That this clown, this damned fool was able to display a scintilla of humility in his moment of downfall.
But no. He spent most of his ‘resignation speech’ avoiding any mention of the fact that he was having to resign, touting his so-called achievements (which include a higher body count than those British civilians killed by the Nazis in the Second World War and probably the largest reversal and removal of citizens’ rights ever with Brexit), and insisting that he’d still be sticking around in the same job till the autumn.
He clearly thinks he’s gotten through another day somehow and lived on to continue to lord it over the rest of us while largely ignoring what had happened over the most extraordinary preceding 48 hours. By the evening, he’d appointed another Cabinet to replace all the ministers that had resigned since Tuesday.
Although the conventions of our constitution means that he’s now effectively set his departure in motion and events will now be largely out of his hands, he clearly still doesn’t believe that he’s done anything wrong and will try to hold on for as long as he possibly can. The turd that will not be flushed.
This is a moment of profound and maximum danger for Britain. Yes, another one (and I know there have been a lot of them recently). Johnson will be squatting in Number 10 while the country boils over the summer, as the cost of living soars and the possibility of a General Strike increases. As Covid resurges. As Putin’s vicious attempts to conquer Ukraine continue unabated. And as the Conservative Party gives up on governance while it attempts to find a successor.
We may find ourselves having one one their savage ideologues taking the helm — a Steve Baker, a Priti Patel — and they take the country into an even more destructive turn. Or we may find ourselves with a so-called ‘moderate’ taking over — Tom Tugenhat, Ben Wallace — and the Tories get to say that they have reinvented themselves again, getting to present themselves as a new party again come the next election, taking away the Johnson sting and winning another term in power. More likely, the various wings will duke it out and make such a bloodbath of things that Johnson is able to sit atop it all and somehow grease his way towards staying in power himself for longer still, positioning himself as an alternative to all the infighting.
However this plays out, it’s not going to be pretty. It’s not going to result in any of the massive problems the country is facing getting addressed. It’s not going to mean that his departure is immediate either.
Still, at least there is finally the slightest pinprick of light at the end of the tunnel that the Boris Johnson era will draw to a close.
Might as well keep that prosecco on ice though until he’s finally out of the door.
